The 6 Ingredients Necessary to Change Your Behavior

The 6 Ingredients Necessary to Change Your Behavior

Most of our behaviors weren’t consciously chosen. We just seem to find ourselves doing the same things each day, day after day.

It doesn’t matter if the behaviors are harmful, make zero sense, or take us further from our goals. It also doesn’t matter if the behaviors we want to do are good for our health, bank account, or the future. We can’t seem to get ourselves to do the positive behaviors regularly.

However, changing your behavior is the key to changing your life!

Want to change your behavior? The winning recipe includes these 6 ingredients:

1.  A clear objective. For example, it’s insufficient to tell yourself that you want to eat less. What does that mean? How many calories is that? What is the breakdown of macronutrients? How often are you going to eat? It’s important to be specific. A few examples include:

–  Eat fewer than 2,000 calories per day.

–  Drink at least 8 glasses of water each day.

–  Eat whole fruits, such as apples, bananas, oranges, or berries for snacks.

2.  Consistency. You can’t create a new behavior with a single effort. You haven’t quit smoking because you refused your urge one time. You don’t go to the gym regularly just because you’ve gone one time. Repeating a behavior over and over is necessary if you’re going to make a lasting change.

–  The less time you’ve put in, the more likely you are to have a relapse and return to your old behavioral patterns.

3. Immediate rewards. New behaviors only last if there’s a reward for doing it, or a significant, immediate punishment for not doing it.

–  Take your favorite unhealthy food as an example. You might love ice cream. There’s an immediate reward for eating ice cream. There is a punishment, but it’s more of the long-term variety. You’re not going to destroy your figure in a day by eating a bowl of ice cream.

–  Consider most positive behaviors, such as going to the gym. The majority of the benefits only happen in the future. Avoiding the gym is actually rewarding in the short term, but harmful in the long-term. That’s why so many bad habits are hard to break, and good habits are hard to create.

–  Work out a more immediate reward you can give yourself for changing your behavior. Avoid this step at your own peril. Willpower is in short supply.

4.  Starting small. Avoid starting with the objective of going to the gym for an hour each day or meditating for 90 minutes straight. These are fine objectives but start slowly. Begin by meditating for 10 minutes, or just showing up at the gym and doing whatever is enjoyable to you.

5.  Tracking progress. See how many days you can perform your new behavior in a row. Keep track of your results – all the pounds you lose, dollars you save, pages you read, or minutes you meditate, for example.

–  Be sure to also track the benefits you notice as a result of changing your behavior.

6.  Persistence. There will be plenty of bumps in the road. It’s imperative to stay the course for as long as it takes. Regardless of how many setbacks you endure along the way, you simply must keep trying. How could you possibly fail in the long-term if you never gave up?

It can be challenging to change your behavior. Unfortunately, many negative behaviors are enjoyable in the short term, and many positive behaviors are only positive in the long term. This makes it difficult to stop engaging in negative behaviors and difficult to create positive behaviors.

Define your desired behavior, give yourself rewards, and do your best each day. Success will be yours!


The Circle of Life

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I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach,  and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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Max the Honest Marker Fable

Max the Honest Marker Fable

A story about why honesty 
 is always the best policy.

Max the marker longed to show his beautiful color. Luckily, when the twins joined the class, he got his chance.

But why did he have to wait so long?

Short Story…

Being part of an assortment of colored dry erase markers made Max happy. He thoroughly enjoyed working in the first-grade classroom where kids would come up to the whiteboard and write with him.

Two of Max’s colleagues, Red Rhonda and Green Gerald, did whatever they could to get chosen by the kids. Most times, they’d roll to the top of the pack just so they could get chosen. As a result, almost everything the children wrote was red or green.

“Why are you guys using trickery to get selected?” Max asked them. “It would be nice if you gave the rest of us a chance.”

But Red Rhonda and Green Gerald continued to give themselves an unfair advantage. That is, until twins named Aden and Adele joined the class. Their favorite color was blue, which happened to be Max’s color.

Whenever the teacher invited either Aden or Adele to come up to the board, they always chose Max. They noticed that the colors used on the board were mainly red and green, so they always chose to add rich bursts of blue.

“Hey, how come that blue guy is getting so much attention when we’ve been hanging out at the top of the pile?” asked one of the dishonest markers.

Immediately, Max replied, “Well, that’s because someone finally noticed that you guys have been giving yourselves an unfair advantage.”

Instead of trying to be what he wasn’t, Max portrayed himself exactly as he was – a brilliant blue. Eventually, someone saw him for his true self and gave him more opportunities than he’d ever imagined.

Moral:  Portraying yourself in an honest light always pays off.

Personal Reflection…

Max loved being one of the dry erase markers in the children’s classroom. He was always bursting with his brilliant blue color and looked forward to being the marker that kids chose to write with.

Many times, Max would get overlooked, but he never let that get him down. He continued to put his best self forward in positive anticipation.

Eventually, the students saw Max for what he truly was and gave him his moment to shine.

Seeing others get ahead of you is sometimes daunting, but their progress is hardly a reflection of your worth. It’s important to maintain integrity and avoid the temptation to do dishonest things to propel yourself to the top.

Honesty always leads to fitting opportunities for you to excel. Be patient with yourself and allow your blessings to come to you in due course.

As you wait for what is rightfully yours, ignore the efforts of others to gloat about their advantage over you. Anything achieved dishonestly is short-lived. Pay little attention to the reign of people who get to the top by compromising their integrity.

Remain committed to your beliefs and trust the timing of your life. The time you spend waiting on your chance to shine is time to be used honing your skills.

At the end of each day, be content with your achievement of staying true to yourself. It is one of the most difficult things to do in a world where people rarely stand for anything. Being you has its value. Trust that the time is coming for your value to be recognized.

Self-Reflection Questions:

  1. How do I stay true to myself amidst temptation to impress others?
  2. How do I go about selecting my role models?
  3. How do I feel when someone else is awarded an opportunity over me?


The Circle of Life

Reveal the “big picture” of your true dreams – and pave the road for a real, personalized action plan

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach,  and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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Staying Present Allows Me To Accomplish More

Staying Present Allows Me To Accomplish More

The mind wanders when I allow it and it is a beautiful thing. But I know the importance of balancing that with the here and now.

I fully embrace my life as it is today. Whenever I think about my goals and dreams, I soon come back to reality to take action to make them happen. Being conscious of what is in front of me spurs the energy to work towards that future life for myself.

I plan for my successes by intentionally focusing on what it takes to achieve them. I keep those things in mind as I move along the journey to winning.

When I take stock of my progress towards a goal, I am reminded of what is left to be done. That reminder refuels me. It causes me to focus on what is in front of me. The journey is more important than the destination.

Focusing on what I have instead of what I desire gives me a sense of gratitude. Being truly thankful for what I have allows me to pursue goals without added pressure.

I go through life with the acceptance that I have enough today. That mindset shifts my motivation to succeed to one that sees future wins as icing on the cake. Challenges are easier to handle when I view the objective as just something extra.

Today, I take my future with a grain of salt and choose to focus on life as it is today. My goal today is to make the most of the time that I have right now. Staying present causes me to really see the blessings in my life.

Self-Reflection Questions:

  1. How does another person’s success affect my ability to stay present?
  2. What measure do I use to determine the level of my success?
  3. What are some of my biggest wins and what makes them valuable to me?


The Circle of Life

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Finding Enlightenment After Rage with Tom Corner

Finding Enlightenment After Rage with Tom Corner

Author & Speaker, Tom Corner Is on a Mission to Show that Strong Guys Can Have Gentle Hearts “Strength lies not in brute force, intimidation, anger or retaliation. True strength lies in peace with oneself and accepting your enemy, which all too often is one’s self.”

After a highly successful career in the restaurant and hospitality industry that shifted to a 20-year career in the Financial Services Industry, Tom Corner realized his greatest contribution was not filling tables, crunching numbers or managing a team. He realized it was waking people up to their true potential.

Walking away from an enviable career to follow his heart and life’s work, Tom specializes in helping accomplished men and women, who’ve hit the wall of frustration, to find a deep level of meaning and fulfillment. Without realizing it, most people live their lives based on the expectations of others. Whether or not they admit it, most men and women feel stuck. Having done so himself, Tom knows that most people compromise who they are meant to be and live lives of “quiet desperation” until one day it all falls apart.

His drive to help awaken those who are sleepwalking through life, makes Tom the perfect guest for a variety of podcast and radio shows. As a seasoned radio and podcast guest, on a personal mission to improve himself as a father, husband, colleague, and member of the community, Tom explores topics that others are often fearful of touching on.

His dream is to help people of all ages find their path in life. He has welcomed success into his life in pursuit of his dreams and desires of attracting love, laughter and abundance into his life. His passion includes health & fitness, mindfulness and deep spiritual exploration.

A lifelong learner, spiritual influences in Tom’s life have been A Course in Miracles, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Louise Hay, Marianne Williamson, Eckhart Tolle, Jerry & Esther Hicks and Beverly Lenz. Business influences included Jim Rohn, Zig Ziglar, Darren Hardy, Tim Ferriss, Tony Robbins and Sully Erna.

Tom’s success is multifaceted as a family man, the father of three, business professional and inspirational author. Tom Corner opens the door to all things possible in life by casting aside our ego to face our fears and reveal our true “Why?”

On Today’s Podcast Here is what your will Learn

  • Finding Enlightenment After Rage
  • How someone can change their mindset through deliberate practice: meditation, affirmations and other techniques.
  • Discuss people in your life and how they impacted you; mentors, coaches and more.
  • What are the Amazing A’s of awareness?

Additional Resources:


The Circle of Life

Reveal the “big picture” of your true dreams – and pave the road for a real, personalized action plan

Own The Day And You Own Your Life

Own The Day And You Own Your Life

Each passing day can seem inconsequential, but the totality of your days is your life. So, each day matters a lot. If you can get the most out of each day, you’re going to have an amazing life!

However, conquering the day doesn’t happen by accident. It requires focus and intention.

Learn how to master the day and in turn, your life:

1.  Realize the power of each day. A day doesn’t seem like much. You’ve experienced plenty of long days where it seemed you accomplished nothing. It’s true that a single day might mean a lot, but a small amount of progress each day can result in a dramatically different future.

Realize the power and potential of each day and be determined to make the most of it.

2.  Have a plan for the day. Have a detailed plan for the day and for the week before you even think about going to bed at night. When you wake up, grab your list of to-do items and get busy as soon as possible.

There’s an added bonus to planning out your day the night before. Your brain has a chance to think about your list of items as you sleep. Your brain will predict the challenges you’re likely to face and have a few solutions in mind.

Try it and you’ll find that your day goes much more smoothly.

3.  Wake up earlier. If you want to own the day, get started early. Successful people tend to get up pretty early. How successful do you want to be? A successful person doesn’t scramble around in the morning trying to find a pair of clean socks. Start your day as early as possible and grab it by the throat.

4.  Focus. What are you going to do for the next hour? Ask yourself this important question each hour. Whether your objective is to write a report, return phone calls, or enjoy your favorite movie as much as possible, identify what you’re trying to accomplish and focus on doing it. Keep your mind on the identified task.

5.  Take breaks. You can get more accomplished each day if you take planned breaks. Working nonstop leads to slowing down later in the day. You’ll ultimately accomplish more if you take a break every couple of hours.

6.  Remove distractions. Distractions will prevent you from owning the day and from owning your life. There’s no reason to rely on your will power to avoid the distractions in your environment if you have the ability to remove them instead.

Avoid trying to be tough and stoic. Just remove the distractions to the best of your ability.

7.  Review. You had a good day, but it could have been even better. Figure out what you could have done differently. Make a new plan for tomorrow and include this knowledge.

Reviewing your day is a pivotal part of developing your approach to life. So many people simply repeat the same mediocre days over and over. Mediocre days lead to a mediocre life.

Are you getting the most from each day of your life? Do you have a plan for the day? For the week? What are you committed to accomplishing today? What time did you get up today?

An amazing life is the result of amazing days. Spending your day focused on activities that lead to accomplishing your goals qualifies as an amazing day. An amazing life can be yours, but you have to create it one day at a time.


The Circle of Life

Reveal the “big picture” of your true dreams – and pave the road for a real, personalized action plan

I am a Board Certified Life Coach, a Board Certified Health Coach,  and a teacher of Mindfulness Living who helps people unlock their potential and live life on Purpose

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